Your Wedding Minister

What is the role of the Minister in your wedding?

Everybody knows that you have to have a Minister to have a wedding right?  Maybe not.   Each state defines who is empowered or  qualified to officiate a wedding. 

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Why does the state get involved in weddings?

By definition, a wedding is the official merger of two individuals into legally binding marriage contract.   This marriage contract is authorized and controlled by state law.   The law affects the custody of assets, obligations, children, and more.

The state defines who may legally officiate a wedding ceremony.   These individuals vary from state to state, but generally include priests, Minister s, rabbis, Shaman, judges, ship captains, justices of peace, and others. 

The Minister serves as a representative of the government as well as his respective organization.  He may represent a church, synagogue, or a other religious organization.  Or he may represent a civil organization.  In all cases, the officiate must also represent the state and be authorized by the state to legally perform a wedding.

Beyond officiating a wedding ceremony, most Minister s are also provide additional support and services to the bridal couple.  The Minister may serve as a pre-marriage counselor, a pre-wedding teacher, a wedding ceremony planner, wedding organizer, officiate of rehearsal and ceremony, a participant in the reception, and often a marriage counselor following the wedding.  Some Minister s require specified things from the bridal couple, while others limit their involvements to those things requested by the couple.

When it comes to choosing a wedding Minister , you need to take great care.  Since wedding Minister s represent both the government and their respective religious organization, you need to make sure that your chosen wedding Minister ’s religious perspectives at least mesh with your own.  If you are Jewish, you may be unhappy with a Baptist wedding Minister .   Ask yourself, what religious traditions best fit your own perspectives.  Then contact a few wedding Minister s to find one with whom you feel comfortable.  Personality, flexibility, religious perspective, requirements of the couple, and availability are all significant consideration.

Once you have chosen your wedding Minister , schedule to meet with the Minister .  During your initial meeting, find out what the Minister will require, what his procedures are, and work through issues of personalizing and planning your wedding ceremony.

Some Minister s resist the creative input from couples, but most are quite open to working with the bride and groom to achieve the best possible wedding ceremony possible.  Since he is a professional, it just makes sense to consider his advice, explore his resources, and work toward your dream wedding together.

How much do you pay your Minister ?  Yes, that assumes you will pay him.  Too often couples overlook this vital step in arranging for their Minister .  How much does he charge?  What is the right amount to pay?

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If you have a Justice of the Peace or a court officer officiate your wedding, the state or local government may set the fee.  If you are scheduling to use a church facility, your use of the building may include the services of the Minister .  In most cases, however, it is customary for the Best Man to actually deliver the honorarium to the Minister .

If you are skimping on your wedding, plan to pay your Minister at least 10% of the total you spend on your wedding and reception combined.  If you are planning a mid-sized or larger wedding, the percentage may decrease a little.  Some Minister s, simplify the issue for you by charging a set fee of $400 to $1,000.

Always keep in mind that the Minister is the one person required by law to hold your wedding.  You can get by without musicians, caterers, coordinators, even bridesmaids and groomsmen.  You cannot have a wedding without your Minister .  He is essential.

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